1000 Gifts...And counting

Almost two years ago I began reading One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp. I friend of mine recommended the book and since she has great taste (thanks Francie!), I decided to check it out. Although I read just about anything I can get my hands on, I am not really into what I would call the "self-help" books - even the Christian ones. But I can honestly say there has never been any book - other than the Bible - that has as deeply and profoundly impacted my life as One Thousand Gifts. 

One Thousand Gifts is about Ann Voskamp's journey to discovering real joy and experiences with grace in the midst of the chaos, craziness and heartache of every day life. Her earliest memories in life are of witnessing the tragic death of her little sister at age four...later she struggled with severe anxiety, depression and cutting. Finally, a friend encouraged her to keep a journal and write down one thousand things she was thankful for - one thousand gifts. And it changed her life. 

Her book centers around the greek word eucharisteo which means to be grateful, feel thankful and give thanks. I have absolutely fallen in love with this word. It's like a little Russian nesting doll of meaning. Eucharisteo is comprised of two greek words, charis and chara. Charis is the greek word for grace but also contains the derivative (chara), meaning "joy". So eucharisteo, the giving of thanks, has grace and joy as its very roots. Eucharisteo is the key to joy. 

And who couldn't use more joy?

I'm a perfectionist. I love need lists. I like order. And rules. Plans. Thrive on met expectations and goals succeeded.

Mothering and wifery (if midwifery is a word, then wifery should totally be a legit word) are the last jobs that lend themselves to perfection, order and succeeded goals and expectations. Put simply, it can be hard to find joy, let alone the keys. Or snuggy-bear. Or sanity. 

There have been many times, especially since the arrival of kids, that I have found myself restless. And if you asked me why I was restless, I don't know that I could have given you an answer. It forever eluded me, like that extra hour of sleep on a Saturday morning. 

Maybe it's the lack of "me" time. Maybe its that today I feel ugly. Or unloveable. Or like I'm living someone else's life. That I should be, have been someone else. 

The answers would change with the moments, like a chameleon changing it's colors. 

But as I started reading about eucharisteo, things started to change. As I took up the challenge to become a seeker of grace, I started to really live. I began noticing things I hadn't before... 

Light playing across scratched eighty-year-old hardwood floors. 

That one long lock of hair falling just so across Sassy's face. 

Breezy lullaby blowing through wedding-gift chimes on my front porch. 

Exquisite luxurious long cool shower on hottest of summer days.

I began noticing grace. Gifted by the creator of Grace. The original source of Joy.

My heart began to awaken and unfurl, like the first crocuses of spring, stretching up stiffly through the hard frozen ground that had held it imprisoned for so long. And as my heart petals unfurled, I began to sense my great purpose...the meaning and joy and reason that had eluded for so long.

THIS. 

This is what I was made for.

This is why I am here. To seek grace wherever it may be found and to give thanks to the Great Giver, and in doing so to reap joy. 

Grace. 

Thanksgiving. 

Joy. 

These are Eucharisteo. 

What better time than now - this very moment - to begin your search for grace, to start giving thanks, to reap JOY? It's already built into this month for you. But instead of stuffing yourself with turkey and pie and Black Friday fillers of the soul, why not fill yourself to overflowing with thanks? Fill yourself full, then empty your cup into the lives of those around you and fill up some more?

If your life is dark and meaningless, the giving of thanks is a match lit upon the tinder of a joyful blaze. 

If your life is day after day after day...why not start noticing the little things that separate those days, making them memorable, making them count?

If your life is good, why settle for good when you could have great?

There is always more Grace. There is always more to be thankful for. There is always, always more Joy to be found my friend. 

And who couldn't use more JOY?

Sun's rise...that rises and rises and rises.

A hug.

Frozen sparkling tiny work of art. 

Tiny girl with big girl dreams.

First encounters.

Now you may say this is NOT grace. HECK NO.
But if you had been a fly on my wall and seen the spider-killing episode, you would have fallen on my crumb-strewn floor rolling with laughter, tears streaming, belly heaving - and would have certainly concluded the moment was so CHOCK FULL of grace you could hardly stand it. 

So PLEASE. 

Search for Grace. He is there. Waiting for you to notice. To give thanks. To enter into fullness of JOY.

I promise you,

All IS Grace,

Carie

One act of thanksgiving,

when things go wrong with us, 

is worth a thousand thanks when things

are agreeable to our inclinations.

Saint John of Avila